Saturday, May 24, 2008

Catching you up... Coming Up to Breathe

Hi guys:

I have not be doing that great at keeping up with my blog lately. During this time of year at work, things get pretty hectic. However, I have had plenty more things making my life hectic right now. A few days ago I found out some news that I can't technically share on here. It is legal news and it's not good. Feel free to email me and I can explain, but I don't really feel like I should be talking about it on the Internet for the world to see. No, I didn't get arrested! HAHA
Anyway, in the midst of finding this out I began to become overwhelmed with my very own party. Yep, you guessed it... a Pity Party.
I began to think of all that has been going on in this past year. I have been trying to get pregnant. I haven't gotten there yet. I feel stuck because I'd like to lose some weight (by some I mean a lot haha) and I can't exactly go on a crash diet while trying to conceive. Michael and I are looking at houses and we actually found one that we really liked but the credit union we were going through gave us to high of an interest rate and asked for some outlandish money amounts so we stepped out of the commitment. Right as we found another mortgage place and got the interest rates worked out, my legal stuff showed up. And only a few days later, we found out that the accident that I had almost 2 years ago has been showing up on my in-laws insurance instead of ours, therefore making ours shoot up now and making us feel bad for them paying it for the last 2 years (they do not want it back). What a mix up, right?!
Anyway, I have been pretty overwhelmed. God has really covered me under His wings because during this week of Spring Break I have felt a whole lot more peaceful about everything. Please just pray that everything works out the way it's suppose to and that I can get some much needed mental rest. I am stressed about all the stuff above but more than anything I have the baby thing on my heart a lot here lately. Last year when we started trying to conceive I was really anxious and then after a few months I calmed down and admitted that it may take awhile and I was OK with that. Now, I am beginning to stress again because here I am on this medication and still no baby. Yes, I know it's only been 2 rounds and I haven't found out the results of this round yet but it still leaves you wondering about the lengths you may have to go to in order to have your own child. I see my friends going through it and I am amazed by their stamina and their patience. I realize that you never really know what your mind will go through during the length of time that you have to wait. So many ups and downs. Right, Beth? And the saddest part is, I have only been going through this for almost a year unlike many of my friends who waited 8-10 years. My pain and anguish is nothing compared to what they went through.
I trust that God will provide when He sees fit and I really think that being a mom is in my future. I am just asking for your prayers in order to help see me through this situation. I ask that you pray for all of the above including the baby thing and for the legal issue to be dissolved. Also, please pray for the continued health of my family and for an upcoming peaceful summer break. Praise God that He tells us to ask Him for help in everything!

Originally posted April 2, 2008

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