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Wednesday, October 22, 2008

A Day of Confusion......A Day of God's Grace

Today has been the most confusing day. I got up this morning in shock that I still had not started my period. I got ready and went to the hospital to have my pregnancy test. At around 11am I went to the bathroom and saw red. I assumed I had started and walked back to my classroom to get a tampon. I was kind of confused though because it was just a small amount of blood and I usually start full force. An hour later when I went back to check, there was just a small amount and so I didn't put another in. I never bled anymore.

So I called the doctor and they hadn't received the results. I called the hospital and the refaxed them and my Dr's office finally got them. However, they couldn't tell me anything because the doctor had to see them first and she was in surgery until 2 or 3 pm. So...... I played the waiting game all day... waiting on a period to start full force or a phone call with an answer.

At around 2pm, the nurse called and said that it was negative. I asked if we could do the HSG (dye testing) this month and she said she would find out. She asked when my period should end and I told her I wasn't sure because I really hadn't even started. She said to give her an estimate and so I told her like Friday or Saturday. My periods never last longer than 2-3 days. She said that it may be a problem because they didn't do those tests on Saturday and I needed to do it after I had stopped bleeding. She also said that I wouldn't be able to try after having that test this month.

So those of you who know me well know that I freak out easily.... well I started freaking out. I was thinking that if they couldn't do that test this month that basically I would end up missing the next 2 months of trying. I was so upset. But before I could worry too much she called back and told me to call Monday and let them know if I had stopped bleeding and that if I had that they would schedule me for Tuesday morning.

About 30 minutes later my doctor called back and repeated that information and told me that I could definitely try this month. She actually said it would increase my chances to try after having this done. So, I go back to the Femara 7.5 days 3-10 this month (the same as last time). They are also checking with my insurance to see if the test will be covered. PLEASE... Pray that it is. I am so broke from driving back and forth to the doctor (2 hours) and meds and this IUI. What am I saying? Most of you are going through it, too... so you get it!

Specific Prayer requests....

1. Pray for Baby Brittain-Goodlett to be in the works even now!
2. Pray that my test will be covered.
3. Pray that (I know this sounds insane) they find something minor that they can fix then and there that is causing this.
4. Pray that it all works!
5. Pray for my mental well being!

In light of this lovely negative.... God has continued to be so good to me. And I could not be this joyful without Him. Would I have loved to have been pregnant? Oh certainly! But He continues to amaze me because who would think that I could be this OK with the news I received yet again this month. That's the grace and the peace of my precious Savior! I Praise Him for this trial because it is drawing me closer to Him! I Praise Him for His love because without it I would be a mess. I Praise Him for this wonderful relationship that we share because without Him, I Am NOTHING! Thank you Abba Father.... Daddy, Daddy! Thank You for hearing me cry out to You! Thank You for giving me this amazing peace in my soul. Thank You for going before me today and helping me to deal with all that was thrown at me. I love You! And thanks to my blogger friends for checking on me all day .......... you guys mean the world to me.

6 Remarks:

Norma

I am so sorry that you got the negative news. My heart hast been heavy today for Elaine and now you. You know you are in our prayers, Norma (Elaine's Mom)

beth ewing

i was about to say the nurse's answer about the HSG test was wrong! and it is said to give you a better chance that month like the doctor said. didn't help me but i wasn't on fertility drugs then either.

as i said before, i'm so sorry for you. i had a good feeling about this. but i'm praying for you. a friend told me she had tons of friends get pregnant on their second IUI and that's when i did too. so i'll start praying that for you.

Jenileigh

(((((((Alesha))))))) I had thought by moving on this wouldn't hurt so bad. But reading today that you and Elaine had negatives breaks my heart again. I'm so sorry. I know it doesn't help to hear those words but I am. I am continuing to pray for you both. Hugs

Jim and April

praying.praying.praying!

Kimberly

Alesha I work in Radiology and we do these all the time. Actully my best friend just had this done and she was blocked. Dr. Cottam opened her cervix and the dye open the right tube so now she should get pregnant. Also her friend was having trouble and had an hsg done and she got pregnant the next month.
I'm sure your time will be soon. I have been checking on you and I can't wait until it happens. It will happen and when it does it will make you a better mother and friend to all of these other women going through this because you have been there.
I'll be praying for you and your baby you will get soon! Love KIM

Teresa

I feel so horrible that you got bad news! My hopes were very high right along with you. I'll be praying for this upcoming month...it's gotta be the one! ;)