CD 26 --- God Is Bigger Than Infertility

Just a quick note. It is day 26 in this 4th cycle since surgery. I had my progesterone checked yesterday but I will not find out the results until Monday or Tuesday. This time last cycle, my CD 26 became CD1 as I started my period. No red stain yet, though I continue to keep checking. I am slightly cramping but not as badly as usual. My lower back is aching something awful this morning and I've been up since 6:30am because I went to bed at 5:50pm yesterday! Please continue to Pray that Michael and I, along with our families and tons of friends, will be able to experience the wonderful news of an impending baby in our future, if that is possible in God's will.

I have had a really, really hard week at work as well as waking up daily thinking that I have started. I have not received my next round of meds in the mail yet, so keep that in your Prayers as well. Am I doubting God? No. But I have to be prepared in case I need those meds. Prayerfully, I won't!

Beyond anything, my Heavenly Father is still an amazing Father no matter what the outcome is with this cycle. I have said that all along and will continue to do so even if I never conceive. If that is His will, someway, somehow He will carry me through the difficulty of it. I can't even comprehend that right now and I truly do not believe in my heart that it is His will that I don't conceive. I have had too many confirmations. There have been too many Christians who have been Praying day in and day out and they, too, have had confirmations. The best thing about today is the fact that I know that MY GOD IS BIGGER THAN INFERTILITY! I am so thankful for that.

Waiting Game

So I am not in the 2 ww. The IUI went well yesterday, despite my RE having to adjust my cervix because it tends to go towards the left. Wonder why? haha Michael's count was 80 million so that was good. Now I just sit back, relax (try!), and wait.

There have been two different things that I have came across this week on the issue of abortion. The first is the story of the famous football start Tim Tebow. I am a fan of Tebow and I just loved his mother's story when my sweet cousin Monica sent it to me.

Tim's mom, Pam, knows about the pain of considering abortion.

More than 21 years ago, she and her husband, Bob, were serving as missionaries to the Philippines and praying for a fifth child. Pam contracted amoebic dysentery, an infection of the intestine caused by a parasite found in a contaminated food or drink. She entered into a coma and was treated with strong antibiotics before they discovered she was pregnant. Doctors urged her to abort the baby for her own safety and told her that the medicines had caused irreversible damage to her baby. She refused the abortion and cited her Christian faith as the reason for her hope that her son would be born without the devastating disabilities physicians predicted.

The doctors "didn't think of it as a life, they thought of it as a mass of fetal tissue," Pam said. While pregnant, Pam nearly lost their baby four times but refused to consider abortion. She recalled making a pledge to God with her husband, "If you will give us a son, we'll name him 'Timothy,' and we'll make him a preacher."

Pam ultimately spent the last two months of her pregnancy in bed and, eventually, gave birth to a health baby boy August 14, 1987.

Pam's youngest son is indeed a preacher. He preaches in prisons, makes hospital visits, and serves with his father's ministry in the Philippines.

He also plays football. Pam's son is Tim Tebow.

Tim, the University of Florida's star quarterback, became the first sophomore in history to win college football's highest award, the Heisman Trophy. Tim's notoriety and the family's inspiring story have given Pam numerous opportunities to speak on behalf of women's centers across the country.

She was the keynote speaker at the Oct. 23, 2008, benefit banquet for two Louisville ministries. A Woman's Choice Resource Center offers such services as free pregnancy tests, post-abortion counseling, adoption information, and material support. Necole's Place is a companion ministry that provides support services for women in need.

Several Louisville-area Kentucky Baptist churches and Long Run Baptist Association help support both ministries.

A Woman's Choice board chairman, John Schmitt, reported at the banquet that in the 20 years since the resource center opened, 4,500 children have been saved from abortion -- 400 in this year alone.

Speaking of the thousands of lives saved, Pam Tebow said, "That just blows my mind. Every little baby you save matters."

That is just one of the most beautiful stories I have ever heard!!!

The second thing that I came across was the video clip of this 7th grade girl speaking on abortion. Wow! She does an excellent job speaking and getting her point across. So awesome!

12-year-old steals day with pro-life speech
Teachers threaten disqualification, but girl chooses to speak against abortion
Posted: February 16, 2009
8:36 pm Eastern

By Chelsea Schilling
© 2009 WorldNetDaily

Despite facing threats of disqualification, a 12-year-old girl took first place in a speech contest when she eloquently argued for the rights of unborn children – after an offended judge quit.

"What if I told you that right now, someone was choosing if you were going to live or die?" the seventh-grader begins in a video recording of her speech on YouTube. "What if I told you that this choice wasn't based on what you could or couldn't do, what you'd done in the past or what you would do in the future? And what if I told you, you could do nothing about it?"

The girl, a student at a Toronto school identified only as "Lia," continued:

"Fellow students and teachers, thousands of children are right now in that very situation."

Pass these stories on please!

Ps. Continue to Pray that this would be the month for Michael and I to be made aware of the presence of our precious child. Thanks be unto God ... for He is a Prayer answering Father! I thank Him even now for this precious child(ren).



P.s. My live signature is finally back after being on hiatus for awhile *LOL*

PRAY ... Friday Morning ..... IUI

Guys... just a quick note to humbly ask for your Prayers on Friday morning. Michael and I will probably head out of town tomorrow night to avoid all the stress of getting up and traveling so early on Friday morning so this may be my last chance to get online. Please Pray for God's will to be accomplished. Pray that if it is possible for this to be the month that Baby Brittain-Goodlett is conceived. Thanks in advance to each of you and to my Precious Heavenly Father from which all these blessing flow!!!

Love to each of you,

Alesha

Ps. Pray for a dear friend of mine who is going through kidney failure right now after a major surgery. He needs our Prayers tremendously!

Pray For My Aunt

My aunt had 2 different types of ovarian cancer. One of which has been almost fully treated with chemo and she has done great through it. The other is getting ready to be treated with a different kind of chemo. The doctor told her that it was called Choriocarcinoma and that if it returned after being treated that would mean that it was incurable. So please lift her up in your Prayers so that it would never return and that all these treatments will work. Thanks and love to each of you!

Estradiol Levels on Day 11

Just a really short update to let you know that my estradiol levels yesterday were 286. I asked the doctor if that was ok and she said yes that was around what they should be at the size they are so far. THANK YOU HEAVENLY FATHER FOR ANSWERED PRAYER! Just Pray they continue to grow and that Friday morning is a success. Love to each of you!

Day 11 update

Today I went back to my RE for another ultrasound. My eggs were growing still and the right side was still not ahead of my good, left side. Other than that nothing really was different. She didn't check my Estradiol levels this time but will when I return on Sunday morning at 7:15 for another ultrasound.

Here's a major Prayer request for you.... my estradiol level of 62 was, in my RE's words, "a little low." I've been trying to read and learn about all that and I am learning a bit but it is kind of scaring me somewhat. Those of you who know me know that I am the most major worrywart in the entire world (and I am trying to overcome this but it is a daily battle... my pastor is helping with a series of messages on "worry"). I'm not sure what all this means and it was so busy in her office this morning I didn't really get to converse with her much about it. I am so mentally exhausted with the thoughts of this level meaning something not so good. I need you Christians to Pray so hard!!! Please... PRAY that those levels INCREASE on Sunday! I feel like God has brought me so far... and I really believe He'll see me through but I have satan here on my shoulder telling me that those levels may mean bad things for this cycle and any future cycles. Pray that God will defy this if it is His will.

All week as I have been on the road, I have listened to a cd by Soldiers Of The Cross entitled "Have You Been To Calvary?" This gospel group consists of the parents of one of my students and one of their married couple friends. Ethan, my student, brought me this wrapped in Valentine's Day paper on Tuesday and I was thrilled to listen to it. It is wonderful! The 2 songs that I have listened to over and over to get me through this week are "He's An On Time God" and "Lord Keep Me In Your Will." These are the two main themes of my heart this week. I realize that I have an uphill climb but that I have a Father who is strong enough to carry me up the mountain. I know He does everything on time and in His will.

This week has been jammed packed with doctor's appointments, work, shots, tons of driving, speaking to my First Priority group, Church, Chiropractor visit, tutoring and reading (which I am trying to rediscover because of my love for it as a young adult and child). It has been so hard mentally and physically to make it until tonight... Friday night. I thank God for seeing me through this week and for blessing me as He has so richly done. Please just Pray for me as I continue to go through this storm... May God receive all the glory for my life and my situation.

Day 9 update

So... I had an early morning today. I was up at 5 and out the door by 5:30 to head to my doctor. She checked my estradiol levels and they were 62... she wants them to continue to increase to 200. I had 3-4 eggs on my good side a few on the other side. She said that it was good that the other side didn't have any eggs larger than my good side. I have to go back again on Friday to get another ultrasound. Please Pray that these eggs continue to mature and that they continue to grow in size as well. I have to continue my 2 amps of HMG with 1cc of fluid today and tomorrow and then she'll tell me where to go from there next.

Michael's friend from work called him today and shared with him that he had had us on his heart last night. He said he felt extremely burdened for us and Prayed very hard for us last night. The funny thing, actually the "God" thing, was that Michael hadn't even talked to David about it in months and he had no idea I was heading to the doctor today. I'm so thankful to have so many good friends out there that are burdened for us. That's truly a blessing. It's great to know that so many folks are interceding on our behalf. That's why I love my friends at work so much... they are always so faithful in their Prayers. The same goes for my most wonderful, awesome blogger pals. Talk about encouragement.

I will keep you posted... just keep on Praying. God's listening and I'm feeling your Prayers!

love to you all...

Alesha :D

Ps. Does anyone know a lot about the Estradiol levels?

Shots....... Shots......... Shots

So... they arrived. I had cycle day 1 on Tuesday and my shots arrived Wednesday evening though I didn't get to pick them up at the post office until Thursday, the day I had to start them. I set aside 5pm daily to take them. I'm already tired of mixing my 2 amps of powder with 1 cc of fluid. And since they are from Europe the packaging is so cool. Instead of rubber tops, these are glass and you have to just break the glass off to mix. It's actually easier to me because you don't have to tilt the vials like you do with the USA ones.

The doctor has me scheduled for my first ultrasound (they monitor more closely when it is a straight injectible cycle) on Wednesday at 8:15am. I hope that I have tons of eggs growing on my left. Pray that I do. I Pray that this will all be over soon so that I can move to the next stage of my life... having my very own child.

I know I have said it before but I can't wait to have a child that I can let God use my hands to mold and shape. I want it's life to glorify God in as many ways as possible and I need someone to sing along to my WoW cd's in the car with me since no one else will. How precious! Please keep Praying for me and my little miracle. And in advance.... thank You Heavenly Father for my precious child that You intimately know even at this very moment.

Nope....

Red stain showed up about midday and kicked into high gear tonight. I still haven't gotten my meds in the mail yet. Pray that I do get it tomorrow. And Pray for me as I deal with all this mentally and physically (shots every day for 10 days).

Laying Low

As much as I love to talk and blog... I've been trying to lay low these last couple of months. I just am trying to not solely focus on my infertility. I am doing this same thing at work because it's really easy for everyone to get involved and then it's really hard to have to let them see you get more negative news. I know my God is real and I feel like I'll get great news but I am just protecting myself.

That's something I've been wanting to post for awhile now. I have learned that I have to protect myself. As much as I love babies and those that I know who have or are having them... I have to be proactive in keeping my mental state up. I really honestly have not ever been a selfish person. Sure... I have certain selfish tendencies like anyone... ask my husband. HAHA But in reality I have spent my entire life worrying about other people. And I feel like that's the Christian thing to do. That's why I have had such a hard time just backing off with the checking in and talking about pregnancy or baby related issues because I have felt like I am not being supportive if I don't.

But I have had an epiphany in the last couple of months. I have realized that I have to take care of myself or I am going to be of no use to anyone anyway. I was really on a downward spiral there for a few months and I tell ya it was hard. I am by no means out of the woods at all. But now I am just trying to keep some things to myself and try to not be so involved with the very things that are in the same realm as what I'm going through. It's very hard... very, very hard. I want to be myself but right now I can't and I need to just take care of myself.

With that said... though it may sound harsh and awful of me.... I am not putting myself into "baby" situations, be it conversations, tons of pictures, baby showers, or friendly gatherings involving myself and friends/anyone who is pregnant or a new mom. I love all of my dearest folks and I mean this for the best I promise. I just can't go there right now. With that said, there are times I can talk about things and I do if I can. It's those rare moments that I do treasure. I want to be a part of everything but only when I feel like I really "can."

Those of you who are around me daily (like my work buddy Kim who is preggo) already know these things but I felt like it was something I needed to post on here for all my pals to see. And for my blogger pals... I promise to try to post more as I can. I actually miss constantly updating.

I am Praying for each of you infertility gals and each of you preggo gals. I love each of you dearly! Continue to keep me in your Prayers and know that you are so very dear to my heart.

Hopefully and Prayerfully I can post my good news soon!

Ps. I do want to share this... my progesterone level was 27 today. Praise You Precious Heavenly Father for that!

Also... Please keep Praying for my aunt. Her cancer hormones are dropping fast which is great, but the chemo has left her white blood cell count extremely low. Pray for her health. We don't want her to develop leukemia or anything (it is possible due to her chemo though they are giving her a different chemo to counteract that).

And... Pray for me I am a tad under the weather with a really bad cold.